{Death} {do you have it?}

Once in a while, you encounter a player whose level of skill is awe-inspiring. These are the players who can do no wrong, know all there is to know, and are gods among men (and tarus).

Inversely, once in a while you meet a player who is so poorly educated, that the mere sight of his /tells sends chills down your spine. Unfortunatly today's post is about this type of player.

I had three types of Tarut Cards in my bazaar, hoping to trade my extras for the fourth type. I get a /tell from a player asking about my price.

Player: Dayum. why so moch monies?

Against my better judgement, I responded, hoping there was some slim chance that this guy had my fourth card.

Pasquale: That's not the price, I'm asking for a trade. You need one?
Player: Yeah. Gimme Death!1! \m/ (Author's note: I'll admit, I dont even know what that thing is.)

Oh god. If only...

Pasquale: Yeah, I have an extra one of those, you have trade?
Player: No i ony hav gilz.
Player: lol gilz like a fish lololol

If I had been leveling DRK, this is about where I would have used my "Slit Wrists" ability.

Pasquale: Well, I guess I can sell you one for ... 100k?
::long pause::
Player: Yes!@ tradetreadtread plz

Now I'm wondering how high I coulda gone, but seeing as these cards were free, I'm happy. I inform him I have to run to my MH and grab one. He follows me there.

Player: Hey! I gave you monies! wherez u?!!
Pasquale: I'm in my mog house, getting your card. I'll be out in a second.
Player: No u are no! I am in your MogHouse, and u not here! I'm calin GM1
Pasquale: WTF are you talking about? How the hell could you be in my mog house?
Player: Well, if this isnt yur house, who's bed is this?????

Right about here I wanted to log out, set my brain on fire, and commit seppuku. I zoned back into Jeuno to give him his card and be done with him. Before I hit trade, I /checked him to see what I was dealing with.

Level 35. Level fucking 35. How could you go 35 levels and not know anything about your Mog House?

Player: Gimme Death. no2w!
Pasquale: Here is your card. Please fall in a well and die.
Player: HAHA YES DEATH!!!!!!!!!!! \m/ (Still no idea what that means.)

At this point, I was relieved that I had survived the ordeal. Following my example, he put his card on display in his bazaar.

For 1 gil.

I am now the owner of a (slightly used) Death card and 99,999gil.